*Eye Infection
*Stolen flute and piccolo
*Boyfriend left

life:FML

I QUIT!
I love how everything i say gets totally turned around and mixed up and in the end....it is my fault...oh, yeah...and my feelings are completely worthless...Im so done

FML......seriously.

could number 3 really be number 1?

im actually having fun with my mom....she is such an amazing woman....the distance has definitely brought us closer.

i hope it actually happens....

damn it! life is so ridiculous some times...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B75jcaJ6yTw

hey,
watch this video and help my brother Adam, WIN the "Save the Mole Challenge!! All you have to do is watch it as many times as possible and invite people to do the same!!

please guys...pass it on to anyone and everyone you know!

they said yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I <3 mimosas!!!

Its my birthday. I'm 20. wow. I have no idea what to do with myself.



why did he decide to be honest on my birthday???? asshole.

i dont have alot of text messages left, so if you want to reach me, just call. thanks! my plan is renewed on the 5th...so unless its an emergency, no texts!

*I feel like i have totally lost my best friend.
*I seems like i am totally disconnected from Tucson and im not sure how i feel about it.....
*why am i putting myself through all of this. why cant he just make up his mind....I want to tell him, but i think it will scare him away....
*why does it seem like everybody and their fuckin mother are getting engaged???
*why cant i just find it already!! I'm tired of waiting.
*why does it suck so bad that my own fuckin family will be too busy to celebrate my birthday...
*it seems like they don't care.......i have just been pushed aside. i understand why, but it just sucks.
* i want to be there with you more than ever....how are you so positive, when the ones who are mourning aren't suffering....you are amazing
*my new roommate definitely brings out a side of me that i think i like.....

UM........OK, THATS COOL. on to #3

OMG!!!!!! I might be going to Isreal during the summer!!!!! that would be so amazing.

-Things are really good right now.

shit. What the fuck am I doing? What did I get myself into? DAMN IT!!!!! AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!

i think im confused.....i dont know what i want....

ok.....first day of school.....here I go!
and it ALL starts again...........

It is amazing what 3 months can do to friendships.

*tea pot...dang stores.
*great band with great dancing
*walmart
*raccoon
*babaddog
*amazing vogue moments
*them making it very hard to leave
*i hope they are happy tears...
*cant wait to leave
*dont want to leave
*mixed vibes.
*missing brother.... :-(
*getting car fixed tomorrow
*JCPenny shopping spree!!!
*i love that i laugh so much that my cheeks hurt...amazing.

geez....why cant i combine my tucson life with my washington life. it would be so much easier. why do i have to chose?

......and he's gone.

i never knew how it was the other way around until about 5 minuntes ago.

he will do well and succeed....i am so proud....we all are.

I am so ready to fuckin leave. this summer has been really weird, granted with some good times...but mostly, i just cant wait to get the hell out of my house again. i am determined to become independant while i am in Washington and prove to my mother that she cannot rule my life like she does my brothers. again, i hate how she controls me at 19...tells me when to be home...yells at me constantly for not taking pearl out or something rediculous like that..and then hangs the fact that she pays for everything when it is really my dad and i should owe her or something...she should support me willingly, not use it as a guilt trip. now i remember why i left......to get my life started and away from her...i just want to go back....i dont necessarily miss WA...i think i miss the idea of WA and all it has....it is truely mine....not my mothers. i know this entry may sound really ungreatful and spoiled and i know most people arent as fortunate, but is it better to have a mother that cares and push it to the extreme or a mother that doesnt give a shit and lets you fail at life?....i just want some where in the middle. i know i cant change her and never will be able to, but it seems like she doesnt believe i could live on my own....i thought mothers were here to support you morally in whatever you do...not discourage you from your own life...even if you may fail.

I also have a new AIM screen name...(in reply to tommy's post) it is : manapana210

hope to talk to you soon!

i wish i could just jump to life and skip all this bullshit.
i thought i had already gone through the hard part.